Walking down the lane
He stared at her
Bittersweet thoughts all around
The Mad Hatter
Suddenly appeared
He spoke to dear Alice
"Oh joyous, oh night, won't you join me this late?"
She stopped
quite removed
The rabbit she killed in her thoughts
"I'll join you for a spell, but by what means does guide you?"
he replies
"Simple ones child, sit with me for tea"
Taking thier places, the table small and refined
The tea fresh and sweet
Alice began to suspect, dire motives
Coming to fruition
A man of straw and a girl of ruby shoes
enters of the wicked plot
Bearing with the ruby girl
A dagger of revenge and malice
She whispered to Alice
"That man of insanity and odd hat, poisons you with a sweet treat"
Ignoring the ruby girl, she pretends to drink the treat
The Hatter screams, "Fakes! Fakes! You fool, the Queen of Roses shall have your head yet"
The man of straw acts, a knife as sharp as wit cuts
The Hatter bleeds, laughing as he dies
He mutters in hate, " I'll get you Alice, for the sands run out for thee"
They travel, Alice, the Scarecrow and the ruby girl.
Towards a place of Oz and beyond
Where imagination only dies and bleeds for the simple minded
They grimace as they enter the gates
To this darker place
Traversing to this mass grave of dreams
They encounter,
The man of broken dreams
He sits in his tree of nightmare and beauty
He speaks " Come to finish me?"
Alice replies "No, we travel to end this"
The dreaming man jumps from his twisted branch
A cloud of mire follows his flight
"My nightmare and me, shall come, to fix this broken place"
They all walk out of the grey place, listening to the dreams
Once loved, now stuck to haunt the pure
The start of a journey they would regret and wish to end
This poem crept up on me, which I is one part I really like about it. It basically deals with my favorite story characters, such as the Mad Hatter, Alice and others. Enjoy the madness of a single mind.
Oh Jon. I love it, I look foreward to the parts yet to come.
Such imagery, quite amazing.
In an advanced critique, I am not in such great position, but I would suggest perhaps chaning it to pure prose.
Ever thought of writing a full short story?
Twould be brilliant.
Thanks for the suggestion, I am thinking of writing a short story, but I often get in over my head and lose inspiriation. So I am going to work my way up by making a long narritive poem, slightly deviated from the true form of prose, but it still holds true.
Such imagery, quite amazing.
In an advanced critique, I am not in such great position, but I would suggest perhaps chaning it to pure prose.
Ever thought of writing a full short story?
Twould be brilliant.
That is fantastic. Absolutely amazing. Simply stunning.
I loved it. I look forward to the other parts.
/priest/
Gave me shivers. Can't wait to see the next part...